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Which college basketball coaches could bodyslam you?

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I’m warning you. Don’t fight these hoops coaches.

NCAA Basketball: NCAA Tournament-West Regional Stan Szeto-USA TODAY Sports

So, tonight some crazy stuff happened in Montana.

A congressional candidate apparently bodyslammed a journalist when he was asked a question he didn’t like. Yeah that’s right. This is a candidate who is on the ballot for a special election in Montana that happens to be tomorrow night. Not good!

Or is it? After all, our president is in the WWE Hall of Fame, so maybe politics is wrestling and wrestling is politics now. Anyway, here are the details:

Whew.

That being said, I’m going to stick to sports for the rest of this post because this brings up an important thought exercise.

We already know Indiana’s college football coach can pull off a bodyslam, as he showed with BTN’s own Mike Hall earlier this spring. But this incident got me thinking: what college basketball coaches would be the best bodyslammers? Let’s run through the candidates. (Note: this blog does not condone college hoops coaches bodyslamming ordinary citizens and this is purely a hypothetical exercise.)

Bob Huggins

NCAA Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Second Round-Notre Dame vs West Virginia Timothy T. Ludwig-USA TODAY Sports

Gotta be the clubhouse leader. His nickname might be Huggy Bear but I guarantee you do not want to get on his bad side. Huggins often wears a track suit on the sidelines so you know he’s already in workout clothes and ready to take you on.

Frank Martin

NCAA Basketball: Final Four-Coaches Press Conference Robert Deutsch-USA TODAY Sports

Look at that glare.

LOOK. AT. THAT. GLARE.

Frank Martin is not fooling around here, folks. You’ll be on the ground in no time.

Fran McCaffery

NCAA Basketball: Ohio State at Iowa Jeffrey Becker-USA TODAY Sports

As you probably know, this dude gets real mad. Put him on the list.

Patrick Ewing

The former NBA star is now coach at his alma mater Georgetown and was part of those enforcing Knicks teams of the 90s that longtime Pacers fans remember all too well. Also he’s 7 feet tall. I wouldn’t try to go up against him.

Chris Mack

NCAA Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Second Round-Florida State vs Xavier Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

I’m not saying the Xavier coach has ever bodyslammed a guy, but I’m saying he hasn’t, either.

Andy Kennedy

NCAA Basketball: Mississippi at Alabama Marvin Gentry-USA TODAY Sports

Like with Chris Mack, don’t underestimate Bald Man Strength, especially with a guy who used to coach Marshall Henderson.

Brad Underwood

NCAA Basketball: Kansas at Oklahoma State Rob Ferguson-USA TODAY Sports

Illinois’ new main man was an assistant to both Bob Huggins and Frank Martin at K-State, so he comes from a long line of coaches with bodyslamming potential.

Leonard Hamilton

NCAA Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Orlando Practice Logan Bowles-USA TODAY Sports

I’m guessing the Florida State coach wouldn’t take too kindly to you asking why such a talented team with a top-10 draft pick got destroyed in the second round of the Tourney.

Jimmy Patsos

NCAA Basketball: Siena at George Washington Brad Mills-USA TODAY Sports

The Siena head coach may not be as well-known as the other guys on the list, but the dude once double-teamed Steph Curry the entire game and held the Davidson star and future NBA MVP to zero points in a game. He also kind of looks like Rex Ryan. I wouldn’t accost him.

BONUS: Retired Coaches Division

John Chaney

Here’s longtime Temple head coach John Chaney threating to kill a young John Calipari, who was then coach of UMass. Chaney also once sent a “goon” in to play against Philly rival St. Joe’s for the distinct purpose of fouling, which resulted in one of the Hawks’ players suffering a broken arm.

Bob Knight

Bobby Knight

Did you really think we’d get through this entire list without mentioning him?