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HOOSIER FUNBAG: How much does Kevin Wilson have to do to become Indiana's best football coach ever?

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This week's topic in our weekly* reader mailbag include Kevin Wilson's legacy at Indiana, when Indiana football actually finishes, and some dead zoo animals that are now in hell.

Rich Barnes-USA TODAY Sports

Hey, yes really, we're actually gonna answer some mailbag questions!

There's not a golf major this week for roughly the first time since mid-June, so yours truly has time to answer your bad tweets and other questions about Indiana athletics before OLYMPIC GOLF reconsumes my life. (By the way, absolutely do not watch the Olympic golf tournament. Acquire a rotavirus. Get eaten by a capybara. Literally do anything else.)

Anyway, Ben's been holding down the fort over here writing awesome weekly previews while I word vomit about the Ryder Cup and fellate the myth that is Sergio Garcia winning a major championship for 2,000 some words. THAT'S THREE SHAMELESS LINKS TO UNRELATED GARBAGE I WROTE BEFORE WE EVEN HIT THE QUESTIONS, WHEW.

Okay, okay. Please don't call police.

Let's get to the questions.

Uh, okay, okay, let's slow down here. Indiana has been historically porous at football for ages. This is not a new concept to you, or to anyone. But back-to-back bowl games wouldn't even put Wilson in the Top 3, maybe even Top 4 if it's another 6-6 season.

Indiana's best three football coaches ever are pretty obvious. Though it was ages ago (1934-1947), Bo McMillan gave Indiana its only outright Big Ten title in football, an undefeated season, and 10 winning seasons. Long ago or not, that's enough to be the best Hoosier football coach ever. The bar's not high, here.

Who you'd rank 2nd depends on if you value the One Season or Consistently Being Pretty Dang Good, John Pont provided Indiana with it's greatest football achievement -- the 1967 Big Ten title and Rose Bowl beatdown at the hands of USC -- but he never really came close to matching that success after. Bill Mallory, on the other hand, took Indiana from 0-11 in his first season in 1984 to bowl game by 1986 -- and then kept them there for five of the next seven seasons. He's easily Indiana's best modern coach, probably second best ever all, and firing him in the 1996 season set Indiana football back a decade whilst Cam Cameron wasted to career of Indiana's greatest athlete ever.

Hey, on that note, let's pause a moment to watch the best video on the internet.

Okay, yeah, another bowl game would be nice. But it might only move Kevin Wilson to say, 4th, all-time among IU football coaches. Lee Corso did get IU a Top-20 ranking and a Holiday Bowl bid, so that might even be worth two Pinstripe Bowls or so. Right now, unless Wilson gets the Hoosiers into a New Years Six game this year, he's probably just barely cracking the Top 5. But there's plenty of time to get far, far higher with that big brand-new sexy contract.

First disclaimer here is that I do not follow recruiting with any regularity at all. I know who like, exists, kinda. So most of this is just repackaged stuff our recruiting writing, David Siegel, has said in Slack. Or other stuff I've heard from other places I don't remember. Like, standing in gas stations or something. I don't know. Whatever.

I'd assume the primary, number-one focus is Kris Wilkes, with 1A being Paul Scruggs for 2017. People that know things seem to think Indiana stands as good as of a shot as any to land Wilkes. Scruggs situation might be a bit more muddled with Indiana's possible glut of guards next year, but his unofficial at Indiana last week seemed to have gone well, per reports. Xavier's involved there too. Hard to tell, because these are high school teens, so we should probably all just find something else to do until they figure it out.

[pushes INDIANA HOOSIER FOOTBALL on to your plate]

just try it, you'll like it, promise

Not Michigan. Not Rutgers. Not Purdue. Anything else, maybe.

First, congrats to some of our former Black Shoe Diaries pals at new Penn State site Roar Lions Roar -- it's cool and you should check it out.

Second, yes. I actually believe this. Let Ben tell you why.

Okay, don't get me wrong, but do you want to have a beer with Kevin Wilson? Like, Kevin Wilson's a good dude, a fun dude. But I'd be real on edge. Like for chrissakes, my fight-or-flight response kicks in just hearing him speak.

"HEYKYLEHOW'STHATBEERMAN,FEELS GOOD,REAL GOOD, GOTTADRINKTHISBEERANDCOMPETEIBREWEDITTHEKITCHEN, ITS A HOMEBREW, WE'RENOTTHEREYETBUTWERECOMPETINGWEREMAKINGPROGRESS, NOT HAPPYWITHWHEREWEAREJUSTYETBUTWEREGONNAGETTHEREBECAUSEWEVEGOTGOODGUYSBREWINGTHISBEER AND THAT HAVE COMETHROUGH THESEHALLS

[proceeds to list every single person who's come through his home and shared a beer over the course of a 6 minute monologue]

BUT, YEAH, WE'RE EXCITED. GOODBEERDRINKERSCOMIN IN, EXCITED TOGETOUTTHERE ON SATURDAY."

Awful hard to throw a football in Hell, buddy. Take the under.

The kick was good.

Have a nice weekend.