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#FireTomCrean twitter accounts, ranked

Join us for a dive deep into the abyss of Indiana fandom.

By David_Siegel

The 2015-16 season was a roller coaster with very high highs mixed in with even lower lows, but you'd be hard pressed to find a way to look at the season as a whole as a disappointment. Yet, with any major fan base, for every rational fan that uses logic behind their decisions, there will also be an obnoxiously loud contrarian yelling at anyone who will listen that we need to Make Indiana Great Again.

For IU, Tom Crean has been a punching bag for years now, and even though he did an objectively great job this year, winning B1G Coach of the Year among other accolades, there STILL is a segment of the fanbase devoted solely to his demise. There's a lot of these opinions to go around, and are pretty easy to spot as they usually come in the form of bland, aggressive potshots from dudes with egg avatars and some godawful, meaningless line like "Husband. Father. Dreamer. Lover of life" in their bios. So, for your viewing pleasure and also my masochism, we take a look at the best (worst?) of the #FireTomCrean crowd.

1. @KentSterling

"HELP! IM AN AGING JOURNALIST WITH NO SUBSTANCE AND THE ONLY WAY I CAN KEEP UP IN TODAY'S MEDIA LANDSCAPE IS BY SPEWING OUT GARBAGE TAKES FOR CLICKS! PLEASE KEEP ME RELEVANT!"  - Kent Sterling's inner monologue

2. @FireTomCrean2

Gotta hand it to @FireTomCrean2, after dealing with the failure of not securing the @FireTomCrean1 handle, he persevered and fought through the adversity to become a thought leader in the prestigious #FireTomCrean twitterverse.

FireTomCrean2 doesn't lack heart, though, as the ability to fan the flames of a rumor that literally no one is talking about in order to make an extremely weak jab at Tom Crean is actually kind of impressive in its own sad little way. In all fairness, I do have to give credit where it's due and commend FireTomCrean2, as the Clappy nickname is creative as hell and deserves an award for its layers and layers of hilarity.

3. @FireTomCreanNow

What a gem. FireTomCreanNow has got the brains and the brawn. First, we start off with a high quality freshman joke, which really stings, because I was a freshman once. This account isn't just comedy gold, though. He backs his jokes up by reminiscing on better times with tweets that are so vaguely written, you can't tell if he just is completely oblivious to the facts, or is upset that his favorite team is abnormally good against ranked teams?

FYI, FireTomCreanNow, Indiana is 6-1 against Top 5 teams at home in the past 5 years and is 21-14 against ranked teams at home in the entire Tom Crean era (including those dark first 3 years).

4. @FireCreanNow

FireCreanNow isn't even mad about Tom Crean apologists, he just thinks it's funny that your standards are so low.

Really though, I really hope this guy finds what he's looking for, because to get to the point where you are happy your team lost just so you can talk shit to people online is so incredibly backward, and it's bumming me out just thinking about it.

5. @NeverDauntedNet

Yes, please tell me more about how I should feel during the final moments of the last game of one of Indiana's all-time greatest players.

As a good rule of thumb, if a person tells you what you are allowed to feel just minutes after telling you that they don't care about your opinion, that person is most definitely an asshole.


CQ BONUS ROUND: @ohholybutt

Jacob is clearly well on his way to living up to his dad's legendary legacy.

6. @Zimmsy

Oh my god I can actually feel myself getting dumber.

7. @CreanyTom

Last but not least, a special shoutout to the Tom Crean parody accounts. Aside from the HURR DURR TOM CREAN SUCKS jokes, my favorite part of these accounts is when they forget they have an image to maintain and tweet out incredibly worthless garbage that has nothing to do with Crean or IU.

CreanyTom leads the way for the unending stream of Tom Crean parodies, all of which make me believe that maybe Eugenics wasn't such a bad idea. I'll spare you the other knee-slappers CreanyTom and Co. so regularly deliver, though, because this research was my cross to bear and it's unfair for me to drag you along in this thought experiment any longer.

I'm gonna go shower now.

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