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BIG TEN SCHOOLS, LIKENED TO THE CITY WHERE THEY WOULD BE MOST APPROPRIATE IN CANADA

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BY SOMEONE WHO HAS NEVER BEEN TO CANADA OR KNOWS ANYTHING ABOUT CANADIAN CULTURE MOLSONS AND MOOSES AND MAPLE SYRUP AMIRITE

Dan Hamilton-USA TODAY Sports

O CANNNNNNNNNNNNDA, I STAND ON GUARD FOR CREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

ILLINOIS - Average! Forgettable! Tim Beckman!

WINNIPEG.

INDIANA -

QUEBEC CITY.

Iowa - Corn, large people, Adam Jacobi, punting.

MOOSE JAW.

Maryland - White people playing lacrosse!

SUBURBAN TORONTO, BUT NOT THE ACTUAL CITY.

Michigan - Self-important former powerhouse that hasn't been relevant in years

TORONTO

Michigan State - place where Detroit people go to have fun

WINDSOR.

Minnesota - wait why is--

MINNESOTA.

Nebraska -- everyone likes Larry The Cable Guy

CALGARY.

Northwestern -- "hey have i ever told you about my Medill degr--"

CANCELLED TALK SHOW ON TSN.

Ohio State -- makes all the important decisions and stuff, let's be honest

OTTAWA.

Penn State -- owned by Terry Pegula, too

TORONTO (BUT NOT UNTIL THE LEASE EXPIRES IN 2018).

Purdue - Positives: Gold! Negatives: cold, lonely nights of sobbing quietly into your pillow

YUKON TERRITORY.

Wisconsin - pretty cool, lots of underage drinking

MONTREAL.

Rutgers - ugggggggggg

82.801708, -93.563748.